Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Fact check? Fat Chance

I came across a website which verifies the "facts" and statements being wielded by both the Kerry and Bush campaigners. It is called factcheck and after reading some of the "facts" that have been thrown about in both gents' name, I have come to the conclusion that both Bush and Kerry are big fat liars (which may or may not come as a surprise).

The current score is: Bush is responsible for 65% of the deliberate inexactitudes which makes him the winner (those stats I just made up to stay in the vein of this post) .

I also read that the Florida election system has not improved since the last election. His brother is still the governor of Florida and this will probably mean that more democrat voters will be intimidated not to vote which, in turn, will allow Bush to steal another election.

Don't you just wish I was lying?



Monday, September 27, 2004

Nani..nano...naniwromi....ehhhh

NaNoWriMo! It took a while before I could say it without looking....

Now I have to do it..


Leafing through the Blogs I cottened on to the word (if you can call it that). I couldn't quite figure out what it was about but due to the amazing technology that is a search engine I got my information after only one click.

NaNoWriMo is a competition for people like myself who think they can write ( which is still open to debate) and are willing to dedicate a month of their life to write a novel of a minimum length of 50,000 words, about 175 pages. It starts on November 1st and ends at midnight November 30th.

Registration starts on October 1st.

It is not important what you write, it is not important whether or not you can write.. All that matters is that you do it (with the proviso that Jack Torrance style of writing.. "all work and no play make Jack a dull boy" is not attempted).
I have now decided that I will enter this competition and at least start writing a story. I know I am not going to finish it, but I am willing to give it a go.


I shudder to think what I will be like in the month of November... I can see it now............
-----------------------------------------------
"Now, we're going to make a new rule. When you come in here and you hear me typing
[types]
or whether you DON'T hear me typing, or whatever the FECK you hear me doing; when I'm in here, it means that I am working, THAT means don't come in. Now, do you think you can handle that?"
_______________________________-
Oh yeah.. I am going to enjoy this...


Sunday, September 26, 2004

Horizon

I love Horizon. The documentary series that deals with a variety of subjects, usually the unusual and exciting.

Horizon documentaries usually follow this line:

Something astounding has been discovered that is too good to be true. *Cue Dramatic Music*

Disbelieving scientists perform tests to disprove earlier findings. *Cue Cool Loungy Music*

This test disproves earlier findings. *Cue Dramatic Music*.
The End.

Every time it is the same thing. It is science's version of Silent Witness. The music takes the place where in that show the lead character stare in the distance in a wistful knowing way. (Cue Amanda Burton!) and the perp is always caught.

What it actually shows is that the world of science have their own problems. They have their share of crooks who try to con the scientific world to attain glory. Of course many are caught but what if a percentage does not? How many scientists make up theorems, findings and conclusions and are never found out?

Last week's episode was about religious artifacts recently found in Israel. The sarcophagus of Jesus' brother and a stone which was once part of Solomon's temple. The guy who found the former also claimed to have found the latter. Very suspicious indeed but this only came to light after the artifacts were found to be genuine. Another batch of tests were performed and these undermined the initial conclusions and findings of the first gaggle of scientists . *shock* *horror*.

I don't have to tell you that those scientists have a whole omelet on their face... I mean, honestly. If a sarcophagus is found with "Son of Joseph, brother of Jesus" scribbled on it and your first instinct is to believe it, you have no right to call yourself a scientist.

But if these people didn't exist there would be no Horizon. It would make the world a less interesting place.


Friday, September 24, 2004

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind..

I went to see this movie recently. "Best movie I have seen this year" one of my best friends said. "Better than American Beauty even". And if this didn't raise the bar high enough for this movie he added "If you don't like it, then it could jeopardise our friendship".

Well I tell you, that was it. I had to like this movie. So I sat in the cinema.. ready to go and what unfolded was.. different.

Now don't get me wrong. I like different more than the next person but that was not the defining character of this movie. I just didn't get it. I got the concept but I just didn't get "IT". That indefinable something that makes a movie memorable. Lost in Translation. That is different but has that something magical that this movie lacked. Completely.

Carrey gives a great understated performance but I guess Jim Carrey's character was not really interesting until 10 minutes toward the end. Kate Winslet was also good but her Clementine was unlovable.. until 10 minutes before the end. By that time it was too late. I hadn't really warmed to them. So, I didn't have the epiphany promised when watching the movie. I didn't have incredible moments of clarity afterwards.

I felt let down because I really did want to like it!! But there really isn't one moment or one line that I would cherish..

Except for the scene in the kitchen when Joel (Carrey) is talking with his friends Rob and Carrie, a married couple, about his heartache over the breakup with Clementine (Winslet). In the background you hear incessant hammering interrupted by a loud "Fuck!". Carrie turns and hisses "Will you give it a rest"? And Rob says, eyes rolling "Carrie, I am making a birdhouse!"

Funny.. But not the classic I had hoped for.

So now it comes.. My top 5 for the year...

1.)Lost in Translation
2.)Bourne Supremacy
3.)Igby goes down (I saw it this year)
4.)Cold Mountain
5.)Kill Bill II



Monday, September 20, 2004

Being Invisible....

Isn't it crazy. As we get older we grow more and more invisible...... It is something that does not happen all at once but creeps up on you,slowly, steadily, surely.

I have noticed it happening to me. I am not unattractive but I have noticed that the looks I used to get now rarely happen. The ironic thing is, that when it did happen to me, I was never sure whether I liked it or not. I wasn't sure if they looked at me because I was pretty, or whether they thought I was weird looking.

They probably looked at me because I was young.

I catch myself doing the same. Looking at someone and admiring their youth but at the same time glad to be no longer 18 or 20. I hated being that young. At that age I did not know my self worth. I did not know that I was pretty and I certainly did not know what I know now.

I am not saying that knowing more is necessarily better. I am a firm believer of being ignorant of lots of things. Of things that do not make you a better person for knowing them. Like for example having the knowledge they are going to fire someone before that person knows. That is never good. Or knowing that your butt is really that big and it is not just an optical illusion.

But being invisible is not nice. It makes you feel less desirable. Less valid. And that is pretty pathetic if you think about it. Why do I need the stares of a stranger to validate that I exist? That I am worth something? That I am desirable?

I guess I need it because if no one acknowledges you, you are alone and if you notice the deminishment of the attention you get, you are on the road to being alone. That is what it means to me. That is what scares me the most. Being alone. Being lonely. Having no one to care about you.

You may disagree. You may think that you have some control over this.

I tell you that you don't. Think about it. If you are old and decrepid and you cannot even remember your daughter's name and you cannot even remember that you were once a smart person but all you know now is that you will get peas and mash for supper (and that is on a good day). When you cannot even remember that your children and your grandchildren came by last year but they have stopped coming because it is just too painful to see you like this but your are too far gone to notice that too. How much control do you have then? All you know is that there is something missing. Something fundamental. Something important..It gnawes that big empty hole in the pit of your stomach.

The weird thing is that you already know what that feels like. I do. It scares the hell out of me. So to make good Karma I make a point of noticing old people. But not for long. I easily fall back to looking at young people. At admiring their youth and at the same time not envying all that entails. I guess it is only natural.








Saturday, September 18, 2004

A Show about North Korea..

I have just seen the very impressive video by Faithless "I Want More". (requires Quicktime, and open it in a separate)

It is scary to think that it actually used real footage of North Korean pageants which are staged there on a regular basis. The "Dear Leader" Kim Jong Il has turned his subjects into a circus act.

In this video you can see how extremely bendy and eerily synchronized the acrobats are. The borg would be envious.

They are "cheered on" by the country's leaders dripping with their 15 pieces of "flair". Most are already one foot in the grave, while children, that over here would still be in kindergarten, show skills which wouldn't look out of place in the cirque du Soleil. Kim Jong Il has an uncanny resemblance to Seinfeld's Newman in this video.. He smiles crazily/quasi-benevolently from paintings dotted around the arena.

Separated at birth??



The synchronicity of the acts are astounding and the fact that they can produce smiles while doing flip flops all around the vast hall raises the suspicion that there are men with guns on the sidelines ready to wing anyone who loses form.

I don't want to trivialize the suffering of the North Koreans. They have had years of famine. Pyongyang is a ghost town and power outages are rife throughout the country. If you look at the space photograph of the earth at night you see great swaithes of darkness across north Korea. And what is worse,every morning at 7 am they are awoken with the sung tribute to their dead "great leader" titled "10 Milion Human Bombs for Kim Il Sung". I bet that one is catchy..

Faithless' video is chilling. Watch it and tell me what you think...

More about North Korea you can find here

For Korean propaganda go here: .

Spot the differences...

My apologies for the overuse of "quotation marks". I couldn't get around it.

Friday, September 17, 2004

Dogs are curaaaazy..

As you may or may not know, I have a dog. A Jack Russell stylee dog with pointy ears and perfect symetry in its face.

Exhibit A (except ours has pointy ears but the markings are identical)

.

He is mad. No he is just weird!.


To wit:


1.) He shags the cat. He is an unneutered male and the cat is one 100% non gender specific (we do not mention in front of him that his balls have been taken. He was out at the time and cannot remember). The cat pretends to hate it but never seems to do a damn thing about it. However, I have noticed that this does not go on in public. I have stumbled in many a time and caught them in delicto flagrante after which the cat throws lame objections to being humped. It never convinces.

2.) He understands English. If you say to him "Look!" He will turn his head and look at the TV. (Even if you point in the opposite direction. The words bow wow, Jack Russell and pussy have the same effect) He will remain transfixed until someone switches it off or until he has caught the creature on the TV. (the latter never happens but he does not seem to grasp this concept. TELEVISION IS NOT REAL!! ).

3.) If he needs to a. go to the loo or b. needs to be fed, he will commence a staring competition with me (and noone else) to persuade me to delegate to someone and relieve the endless suffering of a poor helpless shortlegged brown and white spotted dog. I always lose this competition and am willess at the end. I have to demand that someone walk him or feed him. If noone responds to this unbearable suffering I end up doing it. If you want to ascertain whether it is a. or b. or both you go: " do you need walkies? or do you need foodies?" Which ever gets the biggest tilt of the head wins. If it is a tie, it means he needs both.

4.) He pees his marker on the front porch flower arrangement (they call it a garden but it is hardly that) which drives the neighbour downstairs totally bonkers(Ironically she is a shrink!) I have to teach my dog some manners but unfortunately he does not comply. I don't quite understand the fuss and I cannot be bothered to analyse it.

5.) When he runs after a ball or a toy on our laminate flooring, he looks like a cartoon character who cannot quite get a grip and you cannot see his legs in the blur... (think Scooby doo) I find it very funny every time.

6.) He barks at good looking women that are not me (I mean, look at that pic.. gorgeous I tell ya, gorgeous!). To dispell the myth. I did not train him to do that.

7.) He cannot handle the stress and responsibility of a bone (for chewing!). He gets very grumpy and refuses to sleep. He will guard it tirelessly and he will even refuse to follow us around like a shadow like he normally does. In the end I have to take the bone away and he perks up immediately. We try to tell him that his bone(for chewing!) is just NOT attractive to us and ask him whether he can recally ANY time when either of us crouched down to get it and chew at it. This does not seem to register.

He is such fun.. Mad but fun. The only thing I would say about Jack Russels to you gents is to not pee while standing up in front of them if you trained them to jump UP and UP and UP. .if you catch my drift

Well off to bed.. Push off the dog to make room..


Wednesday, September 15, 2004

My Picture..

My colleague.. Let's call him Stefan has been hassling me over my profile picture...
"What is wrong with my picture?" I ask,
He does not hesitate and dives straight in. "Well, your picture on your blog is severely traumatizing me, to be honest. It reminds me of psychopath's mask in Scream". "You also look like you have been scalped and you have a dreamcatcher earring thing going on there".

Of course I laughed. Unfortunately he wasn't kidding..

"No, no, no" he says. "It is just not right. Let Ron (my other colleague) take a picture with his homophone and use that". (That is what he calls it. Ron's Nokia 7610.. And if you look at the picture you know why.. I mean, it has a mirror for putting on lippy for goodness sake.....And it is white!!!)




"No thanks" I say sulkily.. "There really is no hope. Good pictures of me are as rare as a brain cell in Jessica Simpson's head".

But you know, what I don't understand. I like that picture. In fact I am proud of it.

It is my best one.

What is wrong with....His eyes? Is he blind? I am bloody gorgeous in that picture..

I'm not bitter. Much. But I am thinking up a retort..
Maybe I will ask him to close the blinds because the sun on his scalp is blinging in my eye. (For the record he is not bald but why not pray on his little insecurities?).

Anyway, I am rethinking the photo. I will probably have to go to a professional photographer to match that work of art.

I know. I am weak.






Tuesday, September 14, 2004

I'm Fresh.. Exciting..

http://www.technorati.com/cosmos/search.html?rank=&url=roel%20pieper

Can you believe it? I am number one on a search engine.. a search engine called technorati no less....

How cool is that!?

Of course.. you are never fresh for long.. so this post will probably have to be removed soon...

Update 15th Sept: I am now also number one on Altavista and CNN!!!

I guess this is my 15 minutes of fame..




Count them out?

What would the world be like if we could not or did not count? It is an interesting notion. We get a glimpse of it when we read this article.

In the Amazon lives a tribe that has no words for numbers. It transpires that because of this they cannot count, or at least are very limited in their ability to assess numbers.

The Pirahã, a hunter-gatherer tribe in the Brazilian Amazon, have only the concepts of one, two and many. A behavioural researcher tested whether or not they could understand the concepts of the different numbers without having words for them by lining up a number of batteries and asking the tribesmen to match the amount. They struggled when the amount was more than three and clearly did not have a natural understanding of numbers. (This is now the subject of hot debate among scientists).

Now what fascinates me is not only the fact that they had no concept of numbers but mainly that they got by very well without it. They just need to know that one is one and only alone and two is not alone and more than that is just many. What more is there?

It makes me wonder whether or not they have a concept of greed... And if not, does this imply that greed is related to being able to count? By the ability to see that someone has more than you by exact numbers?

If the Pirahã divide food they will probably not measure the exact amount of fruit, berries or bits of meat one individual has had. They will divide equally but without exactness. There is no need for exactness and therefore they cannot be exact. How then do they assess what is fair and what is not in measuring/counting terms? Or is this irrelevant to them?


What would their lives be like if they are taught numbers and how to count? Will it enrich their lives or irreparably change it? Will it make them more 'civilized'? More like us?

I hope they will never find out. If by now they have not had the need, they probably never will.



Monday, September 13, 2004

I am an ENTP. What is an ENTP?

Extroverted (E) 51.85% Introverted (I) 48.15%
Imaginative (N) 55.56% Realistic (S) 44.44%
Intellectual (T) 52.94% Emotional (F) 47.06%
Easygoing (P) 58.33% Organized (J) 41.67%
Your type is: ENTP
You are an Inventor, possible professions include - systems designer, venture capitalist, actor, journalist, investment broker, real estate agent, real estate developer, strategic planner, political manager, politician, special projects developer, literary agent, restaurant/bar owner, technical trainer, diversity manager, art director, personnel systems developer, computer analyst, logistics consultant, outplacement consultant, advertising creative director, radio/TV talk show host.
Take Free Career Inventory Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com


These type of Tests are such fun. I think I would like to be a something creative. Like Art Director... but what the hell is a diversity manager?

I think Blogging is a means of really getting to know oneself. I want to know more about other people too. It is cathartic. Clean, wholesome fun and I am impressing loads of people with my newly aquired HTML skills. What is there not to like?

Although.. If I look at the results I am a straight down the middle type person..

Hmff.

A sneaking suspicion is building that this could mean that I'm just mediocre and this test is to scared to tell me.... Maybe these people are right after all.

*waves fist to sky* Damn you self doubt!

Sunday, September 12, 2004

Dating Agency for Republicans

I came across this beauty today. Actually, I say beauty but what I mean is horrible example of sectarianism.

http://www.conservativematch.com/

The blurb on the advert is this: " Stop dating Liberals! Are you tired of arguing politics on your dates?" " Are you sick of your girlfriend or Boyfriend bash President Bush?".

My first instinct was to laugh.. I couldn't believe this could be serious..
The next feeling that cropped up was fear. Fear of what this could mean. The Conservatives want to be deaf dumb and blind to what is happening and they certainly do not want to hear arguments that may sway them. The Conservatives are scared of being accused of Flip Flopping. It goes so far as to totally cut out any people who think differently from them. Cut them out! Right out!

The next thing you know is that Liberals are shunned completely (Are you a good Conservative or a dirty rotten Liberal?)..

This is my view of the future if we don't come to our senses very quickly indeed.


  • Before you know it, there will be schools that only take on people who have conservative beliefs and their lineage can be traced back 4 generations to Conservatives who voted Republican. (Well... this happens already to a certain extent in both the UK and US)


  • Conservative children are forbidden from playing with Liberal offspring. They are inferior because they are liable to change their minds... This is not a human quality. No, this is an affliction that is only found in Liberals. Liberal children are teased in mixed schools and are called flipflops.

  • There will be Liberal ghetto's. Manhattan could possibly be such a ghetto. Of course the Conservatives could try to get Manhattan back because of its strategic importance. Bloody battles ensues. Sniping from high buildings is rife and liberal civilians are shot whilst doing their daily errands. (Where is Snake Plissken when you need him?)


  • There could be Romeo and Juliet Scenarios between Liberals and Conservatives.. Bush might have to pass laws to forbid any such interaction and marriages. It might muddle the blood of good Conservatives as it is deemed ungodly.


  • Liberals will be refused entry into cafes, restaurants and diners.

  • Liberals have to sit in the back of the bus and wear tags that identify themselves, as some Liberals have been known to pass themselves off as Conservatives to get the same treatment as other Conservatives.

  • Liberals in the end will topple the statues of the dictator and bash them with flipflops..

You get the picture? Is it a scary one? It scares the crap out of me...

This is my son's assesment of the situation: " So if you join this dating agency you get a date with Bush?".

I guess that puts it in perspective.



Saturday, September 11, 2004

The Mystery of the Lost Source Code...

I have heard of an extraordinary story about a Dutch man, Jan Sloot, who invented a new source code in 1995 that could compress data to such an extent that it would revolutionise the technology industry and could possibly destroy existing companies.

He went with his invention to Philips on March 4th 1999 and gave an impressive demonstation. He had a box the size of 5 packs of cigarets and in it he put a card with a 64K chip. On it were 64 full size movies. The Philips CEO at the time, Roel Pieper, left Philips shortly after this demonstration and, so goes the rumour, joined him on a venture to bring this invention to heart of silicon valley. The inventor Jan Sloot died 2 months later of a heart attack taking the secret with him. Roel Pieper never explained why he left Philips and downplays the invention now. It, according to him, was technically not feasible.

Well this is the description of the invention...
The Sloot Digital Coding System (SDCS) would shake the world. A new alfabet for digital information storage and transport that no longer uses the binary system of ones and zeros but instead uses a much more efficient method. The principle is amazingly simple. Just as a piece of text comprises of a limited number of characters, a movie comprises of a finite number of colours and sounds. These basics are stored in five algorythms in five different memories. For each of the memories the algorythms would comprise of a maximum of 74 Mb per memory.

This was the engine of the invention. The only thing needed to start a movie was a key. Sloot calculated for each frame of a movie a unique code of which another unique code was made. This last code was called the key. It took only 1 (one) KB of memory, regardless of the length of the movie. One simple chipcard could store tens of keys to tens of movies. In this way you could get a key that, with the basic algorythms (in total 370MB)stored on an algorythm player, could "re-make" the movie. This could spell the end for DVD, CD and fibre optics highspeed networks. Copper could be again sufficient and all the billions invested in fiber optics could sink data communication industry.

When I read this story I got chills. Could it be true? Technical experts are divided on the subject. It is not surprising. It sounds pretty unbelievable but there must have been something to it if the CEO of Philips was swayed and quit his job to helm this doomed venture called the Fifth Force.

There is one person who claims that he has the invention with patent in a vault but he will not divulge.

I love mysteries.. I wonder if it will ever be (re) discovered.


Friday, September 10, 2004

100M in 11,16 seconds

I think that is pretty good considering it was done by a 14 year old boy. My son.. Max. I am so proud of him. He qualified himself for the interschool athletics tournament to be held soon in Eindhoven.

He had the second fastest time. Isn't that something?

I am seeing that gold medal already, or is that too much pressure? I want to him to believe in himself so maybe encouragement is a better word.

Although.....I am expecting that he will look after me when he becomes a famous athlete. No pressure..

Hundred things about me.

1. I am a late 60's child. I even lived in London then.
2. I am 5' 8" and a little overweight..
3. I have two children. A boy and a girl. They are 14 and 11.
4. I am half American.
5. I am more Dutch then American but I do at times want to live in America.
6. I hate closed minds.
7. My first memory is of walking around London with my mother. I smelt roasting of coffee and to this day, when I smell it, it brings me back to that moment.
8. I cannot watch suffering of children or animals.
9. I have lived in London, UK, Florida, Cayman Islands and Amsterdam.
10. My favourite city is New York.
11. I love the countryside too but I am an urban girl.
12. I know the name of many animals. One of my favourites is the Gekko. I love poison dart frogs too and I am fascinated by Praying Mantises.
13. I cannot get over that I have a dimple in my left cheek that I have passed on to my daughter and which in turn I have inherited from my father..I want to know where in the DNA that dimple gene is.
14. I believe that I am intelligent.
15. I think I am incredibly stupid at times. Embarrassingly so.
16. I cannot live without perfume. My favourite at the moment is Marc Jacobs.
17. I am a shoeholic. But I a am also a shoe snob. It has to be made of good leather, be leather lined and have leather soles. This is fortunate. I only buy a pair shoes twice a year.
18. I love movies. They are my favourite form of escapism.
19. I have ridden a horse at night during full moon. It was truly magical.
20. I am moved by genius. I am also deeply envious of it.
21. I am moved by feminine beauty. I am also deeply envious of it.
22. When I love a song it will play through my mind for a few days even whilst I am asleep.
23. I love the English Language.
24. I love to see my children develop. I love it that they are very different from me.
25. I love dying my hair red. I want to dye it copper red but I am scared of what others might say.
26. I love cocktails in a martini glass.
Sophisticated and classy, you're in it for the good time and the free drinks . . .
Congratulations!! You're a colorful and
sophisticated Cosmopolitan!!


What Drink Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
27. I love autumn more than I love Summer
28. I have broken in a stalion . At the time I thought I was going to fall off and die.
29. I love cooking curries.
30. I still use a silkscarf as a comforter. This I have done since I was a baby.
31. I love mysteries.
32. When I ride horses, I am totally oblivious of what goes around me. An hour passes in a second.
33. I am scared of being alone. I am never alone. I am at times lonely.
34. I can control my dreams. I love scary dreams.
35. I get depressed when I go to the circus. I don't go therefore. My kids still blame me (well not really)
36. I love genealogy.
37. My ancestors had slaves.
38. I have indian blood.
39. My totem is a hawk.
40. I can navigate. I can read a map too.
41. I thought the world came to an end on 11 Sep 2001.
42. I love reading. I have 2 books on the go at the same time.
43. I love the internet. I think it is the best invention in the world. I love it when you can have knowledge within a fraction of a second. I never grow tired of it.
44. I love old photographs of my ancestors.
45. I have never been so impressed by beauty as when I went snorkeling in the Cayman Islands. The blues of the fish are electric!
46. I have had more than my fair share of abandoned beaches in Spain the Cayman Islands and Ibiza. It makes you feel extra special. How many times are we truly alone in nature?
47. I have been to Florida, Louisiana, Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee, New York, London, Cayman Islands, Belize, Spain, Ibiza,Turkey, Sicily, Italy, South of France, Paris.
48. I love classical choir music. My favourite is Great Mass in C Minor by Mozart and his Requiem.
49. I want to write a movie script.
50. I own a share of a Da Vinci Statue.
51. Buying this share cost us our house in 1995.
52. I think my 84 year old Grandmother is the funniest person I know.
53. I have never been baptised. Neither have my children. I did go to Catholic school however.
54. I hope that I won't reincarnate. I have had a pretty good life and I don't think it could get any better.
55. I am scared of driving. I want to get rid of this fear but I am scared to. I think this fear protects me from getting killed.
56. I am bi-lingual. My kids are bi-lingual too.
57. I want to be a jewellery designer.
58. My favourite stone is Aquamarine.
59. My favourite colour is Red.
60. I didn't start drinking until I was 30.
61. I have an addictive personality.
62. I started smoking when I was 15 and quit a few times. My last time was 6 years ago. I have the occasional one but I am no longer addicted to cigarettes. I am now addicted to my silk scarf.
63. My feet are the best part of me. I also like me dimple.. in my cheek.. on my face..
64. I have had interactions with ghosts. Did not see them but they made their presence known.
65. I don't eat breakfast.
66. I love pepperoni Pizza, Calamari and handmade Italian Ice Cream.
67. My favourite pasta dish is made with a sauce from a jar that I spruce up a bit. shhh..
68. I have a secret that I cannot reveal to anyone.
69. I have a temper.
70. I am a bit of a magpie. I love sparkly things.
71. I have number dyslexia. I switch numbers around and can never remember them. I do remember patterns and this is the way I remember telephone numbers.
72. I paint sometimes.
73. I can draw quite well but gave it up when my children were born. I miss it terribly.
74. I love singing.
75. I never get lyrics right. Which is an endless source of mirth to my kids..
76. I am an instinctive cook. I don't need to measure.. I just do it. I have not burnt anything in a long time.
77. I used to go to fashion design college.
78. I cannot sew very well. This is the reason why I left fashion college
79. I want to learn Japanese. I know a few words that I picked up from watching Shogun.
80. I used to go to school around the corner from the Amstel Brewery.
81. I am not very spiritual. I think I gave up believing in a benevolent god after seeing the unecessary suffering of children. If he won't look out for the ones in dire need, will he grant anything as trivial as a new job? Get real.
82. I do believe in fate. Things happen for a reason.
83. I hate those" You're so special and I am glad I am your friend" chain letters. They are so false.
84. Engrish makes me chuckle
85. I adore laughing and my favourite type of humour is slightly abstract.
86. I love the Far Side.
87. Although I am no longer in contact with my father, I am proud of him.
88. I love it when my kids know more than me.
89. My middle name is Christina
90. I know that the bits in Orange Juice to make it appear freshly squeezed are manufactured.
91. I adore the smell of Limes.
92. Looking at stars and the Milky Way makes me feel funny.
93. I know a lot of things and can do a lot of things but I am an expert at nothing. I really want to find my expertise.
94. I am shy.
95. I love writing caligraphy.
96. The strangest thing I have ever eaten are frogs legs and Escargot.
97. I love trying new things...
98. I love rainbows thrown from the crystal in my window.
99. I don exercise enough. Not by far.
100. I don't like talking on the telephone. I inherited that from my father.

Thursday, September 09, 2004

When PCs attack....

I am just having my lunch break right now. I have finally been able to upload those pictures in my last post and I feel happy. Happy that I have learned something new in contrast to yesterday when I was totally frustrated when I hit the proverbial techie wall.

I am a totally impatient biatch when I am trying to do something and it does not work. I get palpitations, I start swearing, cursing and blinding but that does not seem to resolve anything, funnily enough. It is also always the program's fault. My computer's fault. I am doing it right but the stupid computer doesn't understand what I mean.

Well. I don't have to tell you that that is just stupid. My PC does know what I mean but it just refuses to do what I say. It is as simple as that.

It snapped out of it this morning and below is the result.



Wednesday, September 08, 2004

The poppy

I know this is a very touchy subject. Terrorists are evil. They are the scum of the earth. They do not deserve to breathe the same air as us. Waste of space. Oh there are so many clichés I could use. All of them are true. All of them are what we feel deep down. Dead Children are evidence enough that we need to act.

One blogger said: " We need to fight the war on Terror not in a courtroom but on the battlefield".

My question is: Where is this battlefield? Is it Iraq? Now we all know by now that Iraq is not the source of terrorism. If anything the war in Iraq fuels it. We fight there. Lives are being lost there. Oil prices shoot up and up and up and even more people are sent overseas to fight. Of course we need to sacrifice and pay our dues to attain peace. But when are we throwing good lives after bad?

I fear Peace is "like poppies spread. Seize the flower and its bloom is shed" ( paraphrasing Robert Burns).



I am not saying that you can have peace by just being an observer. But you may keep/attain peace by leaving things the f*ck alone!

I can think of many examples.. Let's look at N-Ireland. We don't need bleedin' Orange men marching through Catholic neighbourhoods to provoke and to pick a fight. But what would happen if the catholics just stay in their houses and waved? What would happen then?

I know I am being simplistic. Or naive. But for some reason my feeling is that we make things too complicated.

Blood has been shed but an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth does not work.

We would all look like this..





The Beslan School Massacre was perpetrated by Chechnyans and hired mercenaries. The hired mercenaries are worse than scum but what about the Chechnyans? Their country has been a battlefield for many years now. Russia has commited some atrocities of its own (they estimate that russian soldiers raped over 2.000.000 East German women after the war), and it has spawned some evil people among the Chechnyans. Some of them women, young, pretty even,who do not blink an eye at blowing up a whole school and murdering innocent children.

If I was one of the parents who lost a child I would like the head of the persons responsible. On a stake. No doubt about it. I guess I wouldn't give a toss about peace either, initially. But it would come. When hatred disappates slightly.

I think no nation has the right to be sanctimonious. Every nation has commited atrocities under its flag. In the past. In the present. In the future. We will create vengeful, angry, warped, evil people in doing so.

Ah well. Poppies will grow again in May. I do so have the urge to pick them.



Windows to people's lives..

When I was little, and sitting in my grandfather's car at night, I used to look at all the appartment blocks and all the lit up windows, seeing people moving around behind them, living their lives and I wondered about how different their lives were.. I always got a funny feeling that is difficult to describe.

I get that same feeling when I browse through all these blogs of people with similar interests and similar tastes and I wonder whether or not we are unique.. I am not so sure... you get glimpses of these peoples lives and their view on the world. Of course, they only show what they want you to see but that, like net curtains behind a window, only partly covers what goes on and what people are about... Emotion. Universal it is.. (without wanting to sounding too much like Yoda) and what binds us all (without wanting to sounding too much like Galadriel) .


I have read about..

- Horror over all the loss of young and innocent lives in Beslan.
- Grief for all the people who are starving in Sudan but are now no longer in the news because of the massacre at Beslan.

I see people write about it in their blogs and of course they stand still and think about it but they go on with their lives and that is the way it should be. There is only so much viewing of those raw emotions and pain that you can bear... We are just not able to take it in and it makes us feel powerless, useless and guilty. We draw the drapes... We block it out.

But for the grace of god, eh?




Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Of Curries and Intellectuals



This weekend I decided to stick to one cuisine. I have made curries Saturday and Sunday and have spent a total of 4-5 hours in the kitchen. I cooked a Tikka Masala type dish complete with saffron pulao rice and chapatis and on Sunday a Chicken Jalfrezi and a potato and pea curry on the side. I did not have any saffron left over, so I made a pulao blanche (made that name up just now).
It was quite good but I am as always, ever so slightly, disappointed. Sometimes I don't know why I keep persevering because it is never as good as I thought it was going to be. Or that it deserves to be considering the time I put into it.


Is it because I am too much of a perrrfectionist/Martha Stewart type person? (Please!) Or is it because I just can't cook as well as I would like to think..


Just exactly the same as that I am never as good looking on photos as I am in my head. I am bloody gorgeous in my head, I am.

And for that matter...what is reality???? A photo??? Pffff.. I have two words for you.. Big Foot. Or is that one word?

Well you know.. You may think that is a big foot but really it is more likely that it is a big man in a hairy suit. So in photographs I may look like a slightly overweight thirtysomething woman but it in actual fact it is more likely I am a thirtysomething slightly overweight stunna.
And a great cook to boot. Or is
Jean Baudrillard turning in his grave when I say such things?

Okay.. I sound really pretentious now. Maybe I am also not as intelligent as I'd like to think. hmmmm..
*takes finger to quasi-intellectual chin*


On a lighter note. Jamie Oliver is starting up a "Fifteen" restaurant right here in Amsterdam! I would be very interested in eating there to see if his dishes are better than when I cook them...
In my mind I would think Jamie better watch out..and thtep to the plate.


In reality? Well.....

-Listing to Faithless, No Roots-

Saturday, September 04, 2004

20 Questions

I have found a really creepy website. It is not about ghosts, it is not about some mysterious monster roaming the back streets of Amsterdam or the lakes of scotland..No, it is an artificial intelligence that can guess what you are thinking within 20 questions.

Give it a go and be really creeped out!

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

I am in the IN crowd.

I am now the exclusive and proud owner of a Gmail account. I am very very very pleased. Thank you RKE for that! mail me on juliet1@gmail.com
I also want to give you a little lists of the sites I like:
Starting with:
http://www.forteantimes.com/for all the weird things that happen in this world

http://www.joblo.com/For all the hush, hush and on the Q.T. news on movies. You hear it here first..probably

http://www.cinemascreen.co.uk/ for all your movie recommendations. You rate some movies you like, and up pops some recommendations. It uses a certain formula that works..kinda

Stealing off in the middle of the night....

Well the saga has now finally come to an end. My father has left, vowed he never wanted to see me again (I have not heard him say this.. this is second hand info), and left without saying goodbye. It has been not been a highlight in our father-daughter relationship and I feel that this has been a turning point.

I was wondering why he has no feelings for either myself or for my children? Was it because he was never really loved himself? His mother died when he was 7 and his father and stepmother did not show him a great deal of affection. Besides, children in the states are chastised with belts for not saying SIR,YES SIR when they are asked something (even if the answer should be no). That is something that is fairly alien to the average person who has had a European upbringing.

Well let's just analyze this bit... I am not saying it excuses anything... If you are not loved, and beaten for not saying SIR, YES SIR (even if the answer should be no)you cannot love yourself and therefore cannot love another.. even if it is your own flesh and blood. Capish??

He told my mother he is scared of me. You know, I have barely said anything to my father in all of the 3 hours we were in each others company. Does he feel my silent disapproval? It is there I have to admit.. Disapproval but then again, maybe it is disappointment. I am disappointed that he has not had the courage to stop drinking when I am around. It has always been like that and that is why I do not know my REAL father. I only know the drunken imposter that comes round every 6 years.


By the way.. You know what is spooky? I bought a book when I was in London last week..
I bought this book . My dad bought the same book on the same day in the same shop...oohweeeeeeehooooooooo
Despite the creepy connotations I can't praise this book enough.

READ IT!!!